Thursday, September 28, 2006

Our miracle

We arrived at our second ultrasound....bracing ourselves. Strangely my bad feelings had subsided & i secretly had a feeling maybe, just maybe things would be ok...but was way too terrified to voice that. We didnt have to wait today - thank god. We had the same sonographer as last week. As she was getting ready, i politely asked her if she could measure the ovaries & other things she needs to measure after she tells us if the baby is alive...she agreed. I inserted the probe & immediately she found a heartbeat!!!!!!

I could see it, i could actually see it, it was clicking away. A immediately said "its not fast". I responded "to me it looks fast" She told us it was 140 beats / minute. I braced myself once more as I asked her how big the baby was....she measured him/her & reported it was measuring 6 wks & 6 days so it had grown a full 8 days in 7 days - the most it could have grown.

I burst into tears, not a few tears - a sob...the anxiety, fear, trauma I'd been holding onto all week came pouring out - it was, for today, a great result.

We couldn't believe it.....our prayers & all the collective prayers from our friends & you, my amazing blog supporters had been heard.....& yet we're only 7 weeks & 2 days & have 5 more weeks of this risky time....

It feels like centuries still.

We saw the dr after the u/sound - he compared the results from last week to this week & told us we were (for today) going very well.

We kissed & cried & sighed & exhaled a lot but felt tremendous anxiety & fear too as now the stakes get higher.

We left the clinic & headed to our acupuncturist who was excited too. Its quite endearing, shes sees my pregnancy as her personal challenge. She felt my pulses & this time expressed my right hand energy pulse is still weak but my yin left hand pulse very strong & she said she felt it was a boy....a very naughty boy. I too felt it had to be a boy, after all a little girl wouldn't do this to us. Strange actually, it feels like boy energy to me too....

listen to me....its so scary to even consider a little girl or boy....way too premature.

Our RE called me - he actually congratulated me & told me we are exactly normal today....he actually said i have to book in to see an obstetrician for an appt in week 10 which felt way too scary & premature but according to him, a percentage of risk has dropped & all (hopefully) could be & should be ok. blog supporters....for today we are smiling. I want to thank you all sooooooo very much for your thoughts, wishes & prayers. Please keep praying as we have quite a road still ahead of us.

Im terrified but cautiously optimistic.

We have another u/sound next thurs. These weekly waits are agony.

Thanxxxxxx to you all.


Blogger running wildly said...

Oh WOW! Thrilled for you. So great. You must just be on cloud 9!!!!!!!! Horray little one for sticking it out and growing like crazy! Praying for you still, since everyday will continue to be a journey.

3:59 PM  
Blogger Michelle said...

Great news! I'm so excited for you! I will keep my fingers crossed. Grow baby, grow!

4:55 PM  
Anonymous mae said...

my heart was jumping when I read the beautiful news! i am so happy for you and A. what a joy to hear "tiny heartbeat" is working so strongly on his way into the world.

you'll be in my thoughts and prayers each day of the coming up week till another positive reply. keeping all my fingers crossed and wishing for you also, to be able to (consciously?) enjoy time with your growning bug.

7:11 PM  
Anonymous Nikole said...

This is absolutley fantastic news. I'm utterly thrilled for you.


9:48 PM  
Blogger serenity said...

I am so thrilled, I don't have any words to convey it. I have been sending you hope and growing vibes since I first read about the bump in the beta.

Nothing is certain, ever - and yes, the stakes are higher - but I remain hopeful for you.

Love and hugs.

10:07 PM  
Blogger One Mother's Journey said...

Congrats! Wonderful news.

10:44 PM  
Blogger Stephanie said...

How amazing! and fabulous! and completely wonderful! I am sitting at my desk smiling from ear to ear for you and A. I am so thrilled for you!

11:31 PM  
Blogger theoneliner said...


I am teary eyed. No way. I mean, i kept hoping...i wanted this sooo much for you guys...and it looked so bad.

He's a fighter.

Holy cow. I don't know you, barely read your blog before the last two weeks and you've just made my day.


1:38 AM  
Anonymous Jill said...

Congratulations on the great ultrasound! I'm very happy and relieved for you.

2:38 AM  
Blogger Amber said...

OH YEAH!!!!!!!!!!!!! I am so happy for the good news. What a blessing! I'm crying for you hon. I'll continue to keep you in my prayers and your little peanut too.
PS, Naughty little boys are so much fun!

3:22 AM  
Blogger moi said...

a fantastic sign that your baby grew SO MUCH!!!

and, a heartbeat! how exciting...


4:35 AM  
Blogger Sunny said...

I am so glad you got some good news!!!

6:54 AM  
Blogger sube said...

I'm a little late catching up here, but I'm no less thrilled to hear your news! It's simply wonderful.

10:39 AM  
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11:44 AM  

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