Our miracle

We arrived at our second ultrasound....bracing ourselves. Strangely my bad feelings had subsided & i secretly had a feeling maybe, just maybe things would be ok...but was way too terrified to voice that. We didnt have to wait today - thank god. We had the same sonographer as last week. As she was getting ready, i politely asked her if she could measure the ovaries & other things she needs to measure after she tells us if the baby is alive...she agreed. I inserted the probe & immediately she found a heartbeat!!!!!!

I could see it, i could actually see it, it was clicking away. A immediately said "its not fast". I responded "to me it looks fast" She told us it was 140 beats / minute. I braced myself once more as I asked her how big the baby was....she measured him/her & reported it was measuring 6 wks & 6 days so it had grown a full 8 days in 7 days - the most it could have grown.

I burst into tears, not a few tears - a sob...the anxiety, fear, trauma I'd been holding onto all week came pouring out - it was, for today, a great result.

We couldn't believe it.....our prayers & all the collective prayers from our friends & you, my amazing blog supporters had been heard.....& yet we're only 7 weeks & 2 days & have 5 more weeks of this risky time....

It feels like centuries still.

We saw the dr after the u/sound - he compared the results from last week to this week & told us we were (for today) going very well.

We kissed & cried & sighed & exhaled a lot but felt tremendous anxiety & fear too as now the stakes get higher.

We left the clinic & headed to our acupuncturist who was excited too. Its quite endearing, shes sees my pregnancy as her personal challenge. She felt my pulses & this time expressed my right hand energy pulse is still weak but my yin left hand pulse very strong & she said she felt it was a boy....a very naughty boy. I too felt it had to be a boy, after all a little girl wouldn't do this to us. Strange actually, it feels like boy energy to me too....

listen to me....its so scary to even consider a little girl or boy....way too premature.

Our RE called me - he actually congratulated me & told me we are exactly normal today....he actually said i have to book in to see an obstetrician for an appt in week 10 which felt way too scary & premature but according to him, a percentage of risk has dropped & all (hopefully) could be & should be ok.

So...my blog supporters....for today we are smiling. I want to thank you all sooooooo very much for your thoughts, wishes & prayers. Please keep praying as we have quite a road still ahead of us.

Im terrified but cautiously optimistic.

We have another u/sound next thurs. These weekly waits are agony.

Thanxxxxxx to you all.